THE COLOURS OF HAPPINESS
We start so young being influenced by the world
around us and those people with whom we come in contact.
Often times the shaping of our very being can be such a
painful process, but we each must go through it.
Little by little we learn to bend as we are
molded into what others want us to be. Little by little we
learn to display what others want to see, and put aside the parts
of us that others don't seem to wish to acknowledge. Those
parts aren't always bad ... just others can't seem to handle
dealing with them. As if in some great dance, we
learn the social proprieties of life.
So it is ... we begin creating caverns inside.
So it is we learn how to please others ... and how to get
attention. We begin the weaving of a person.
As we venture through life, the process
continues. We are continually forced into the molds of
other's expectations. We are compartmentalized into their
little boxes that keep them safe and content. We sometimes
do it to ourselves as well, but more often than not, it is our
desire and need to be accepted ... to be wanted ... to be loved
... and so we bend, and we weave, and reroute our circuitry for
the sake of belonging and pleasing others. We learn that
even though we love to color in our books with reds, that
everyone is coloring in blue, so we put our red crayons down in
exchange for a blue one. We may not like being part of the
games that are being played on the playground, but it's the only
way that we can become part of the group, and so we join in.
The weaving sometimes is so very complex.
We find ourselves in the looms of life and we spin and turn
and bend. The tapestry being woven with the fibers of our
soul and spirit.
There are times when we feel like we will burst
if we don't get to express ourselves but more often than not, we
hold those pleasures deep inside.
Then one day ... we learn how tightly woven
we've become. We learn that all of those feelings from
inside are really us, just trying to get out ... just trying to
express themselves. It is that realization that gives us
the feeling of being lost ... the feeling of captivity ... the
feeling of not being able to realize those dreams. Even
into adulthood we put down our red crayons and color our world
with blue.
There comes a time when we feel ourselves
letting go. Some are able to do it in a manner acceptable
to society. Others are not so fortunate. But soon, we
learn that if we don't let go ... if we don't fulfill our dreams
that we will bend to the point of breaking and become nothing
more than little splinters of ourselves.
Then it happens .. we begin to
say what we feel .. we begin to sing songs we've always loved.
We begin to dance the dance of the music in our heart.
We find ourselves stretching, dreaming outloud, twirling
and swirling in happiness because that day comes when we free
ourselves of everyone's expectations. That day comes
when we finally say, "but that's not me ... that's
you". It is then, that we sing the loudest. It
is then that we find our red crayons and the whole world takes on
a different color. We are freed.
That color is called HAPPINESS.
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